I'd try

I'd try to stay happy
If it made any difference to you
I'd try to show you how i feel
If it mattered in the long run.
I am tired of the cold, quiet desperation that I always seem to find myself in.
But standing here I cannot bask in the warmth of your happiness.
always the fool am I
and you not knowing the difference play and dance to the song that i sing.
I am a lost minstrel, whose heart is on display for all the world.
Each one shuffling past looking for only a moment, then turning to the next novelty.
I ought to have a sign
"Jordan the ever constant chump."
Then, maybe you would have known what you were dealing with in the beginning.